Rebels are one thing, but don’t tangle with the GMC.
To Dr Bashar al-Assad:
Re: Notification of lapsed GMC registration
Dear Dr Assad,
It has recently come to our attention that you have let your General Medical Council registration lapse.
Maintaining your registration is essential for practising medicine in the UK. Without an active GMC registration, you are no longer legally authorised to work as a doctor or undertake any activities requiring medical registration.
According to our records you qualified in 1988 from Damascus medical school and after working as a medic in the military you commenced an ophthalmology training scheme in London at the Western Eye Hospital.
Since deciding to leave the NHS you have been running a brutal totalitarian police state marked by numerous human rights violations. We are also aware that you have fostered a cult of personality and have built hundreds of statues in your own image.
However, as we’re desperate for anyone to work in the UK (honestly, we’ll take anyone these days) and because you look more like a comedy French postman than a dictator, we are willing to overlook these transgressions. We are willing to turn a “blind eye” if you will (I hope you get the joke)!
If you do wish to reapply please be aware that you will still need to pass PLAB part 1 and 2, and score an average of 8 or above in the IELTS exam. You will also need to join a returners scheme and work for a pittance rotating around placements in the far north of England.
You will be provided with hospital accommodation and have access to the NHS canteen. In fact we believe that the conditions are fairly similar to Sadnaya prison so you should feel right at home.
We value your contributions to the medical profession, Dr Assad, and we hope to see you return to the register and medicine in the UK in the near future.
Yours sincerely,
The GMC
Main image adapted from a cartoon available under a Creative Commons licence.
