For service to general practice.
Each year governments, agencies and various bodies do their best to make GPs’ lives just a little bit more annoying.
The Golden Enema Awards aim to recognise and celebrate the best of the worst ideas for the year.
2023’s runners up are:
AHPRA, for increasing its fees
Nobody likes being persecuted, especially if you have to pay extra for it. So in 2023 AHPRA put your fees up to help it cope with the increasing volume of notifications against you. Hey, if you’re a struggling GP who removes the odd skin tag here and there it’s only fair that you cover the cost of persecuting wealthy cosmetic surgeons!
Services Australia, for destroying telehealth
Phoning patients and billing a 91891 was working just fine for your frail elderly patients, which is exactly why Services Australia came along, removed verbal consent and replaced it with a load of red tape. The only people happy about this are the ones working at the red-tape factory – they’ve never been busier!
Labor government, for indexation
1 November marked the introduction of a second round of indexation this year.
Everything went up by 0.5%, meaning a standard GP consultation rebate increased from $41.20 to $41.40.
Twenty cents wouldn’t buy you a handjob in the 1850s!
The three runners up get this beautifully presented gift set:
And this year’s winner of the Golden Enema Award is … MyMedicare!
“Think of MyMedicare as a freight train full of cowshit whose brakes have failed just as it’s rounding the bend into Bullshit Station,” Professor Candid told TMR.
“Nothing about it works and it’s just going to make an awful mess.”
Congratulations to the winners, who will receive their golden enema kits in the post.
