How you answer all those awkward questions, like ‘why?’, says a lot about you.
So you’re trying to get your patients to sign up to MyMedicare.
But how exactly do you explain it to them and convince them this is in their best interests and that of our health system?
Take Professor Candid’s quiz.
1) What is it, exactly?
Do you say:
A) MyMedicare is a new way to formalise relationships between patients and their healthcare provider;
B) MyMedicare is made by combining two separate words – Mym and Edicare;
C) MyMedicare is … oh hang on a minute … no, bollocks, it’s gone;
2) What difference will it make?
Do you say:
A) MyMedicare can lead to better health outcomes;
B) MyMedicare is the first Faustian step along the hellish route towards capitation and the carnival of shit that we now see playing out in the UK;
C) Just sign the bloody form!
3) I still don’t understand what it is.
Do you say:
A) MyMedicare allows your chosen doctor to get additional government funding to deliver the care you need;
B) MyMedicare is a cyborg sent from the future to destroy general practice. It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop … ever, until you are dead!
C) Are you Sarah Connor?
4) Explain it to me again.
Do you say:
A) MyMedicare allows more regular GP visits and better care planning for people living in a residential care home;
B) MyMedicare is an enigmatic waste of time, a bloated corpse washed up on an isolated shingle beach in Felixstowe;
C) Thinking about MyMedicare has the same psychological effect as watching the Roy Orbison scene from Blue Velvet.
5) But why?
Do you say:
A) MyMedicare provides greater continuity and quality of care;
B) MyMedicare needs you!
C) MyMedicare makes as much sense as Salvador Dalí’s Gala Born From An Egg.
If you answered mainly As well done! You are an insensate mouthpiece of the state!
